This Machine Gun-Equipped Cybertruck Might Just Be the Worst Technical Ever

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No, this isn't a frame from "Mad Max: Fury Road"; that's Chechen leader Ramzan Kadyrov with a machine gun in the back of a Tesla Cybertruck.
No, this isn't a frame from 'Mad Max: Fury Road'; that's Chechen leader Ramzan Kadyrov with a machine gun in the back of a Tesla Cybertruck. (Kadyrov/Telegram)

Want to kick a hornet's nest? Say the name Tesla Cybertruck in public. Electric vehicle evangelists will wail, and truck nuts will gnash their teeth. Anything you say can and will be taken as a hard-line political statement.

Believe it or not, someone managed to take an even stronger stance than any of those partisans. Ramzan Kadyrov, described by CNN as the "warlord leader" of the Russian region of Chechnya, figured out exactly what's been missing from the Cybertruck all along: a machine gun.

In a viral Telegram post, Kadyrov appears behind the wheel of a new Cybertruck as it drives around Chechnya's capital of Grozny with what appears to be a Russian Kord machine gun mounted in the unusual vehicle's truck bed.

The belt-fed Kord fires 12.7x108 mm ammunition that, as manufacturer ZKMK is quick to point out, is larger than NATO's 12.7x99 mm round (that's .50 BMG, to nations that have been to the moon). It's designed to take out lightly armored vehicles and positions from as much as 2,000 meters away.

According to the Google translation of a post on Kadyrov's Telegram account, the Chechen leader took a break from busting out reps on the bench press and rolling with the boys to thank Tesla technoking Elon Musk for the truck.

Automotive trends will come and go but belt-fed weapons and truck beds will never go out of style.
Automotive trends will come and go, but belt-fed weapons and truck beds will never go out of style. (Kadyrov/Telegram)

"We received a Tesla cybertruck from the respected Elon Musk," Kadyrov wrote. "I was happy to test the new technology and personally saw that it is not by chance that it is called the 'Cyberbeast.' A real invulnerable and fast animal. A maneuverable car, develops excellent speed and overcomes obstacles. A very comfortable car."

Kadyrov added that, based on the Cybertruck's "excellent characteristics," he planned on deploying the armed vehicle in support of Russia's ongoing "special military operation" in Ukraine, where he said he was sure the "beast" would be "of great use to our soldiers."

"I express my sincere gratitude to Elon Musk," Kadyrov continued. "He is, of course, the strongest genius of our time and a specialist. A great man! Well, the Cybertruck turned out to be a powerful project. Undoubtedly one of the best cars in the world! I literally fell in love with this car."

And what's a good thank-you note without an offer to return the favor? "Come to Grozny, I will receive you as my most dear guest," Kadyrov concluded. "I do not think that our Russian [Ministry of Foreign Affairs] will be against such a trip."

The unofficial Road Rage Package includes 1,000 rounds of 12.7x108 ammunition.
The unofficial Road Rage Package includes 1,000 rounds of 12.7x108 ammunition. (Kadyrov/Telegram)

The news that the Cybertruck would allegedly find its way to the war in Ukraine met mixed reviews, while Musk vehemently denied having anything to do with the Cybertruck's militarized transformation and arrival in Kadyrov's garage.

The Cybertruck has been a lightning rod since it hit the scene in 2019, as Business Insider reported at the time. Designwise, it was a stark departure from Tesla's previous vehicles and the EV market, in general. Then there was the real-world range (250 miles instead of the promised 500 miles) and starting price ($60,990 instead of the original $39,900). While it is purportedly bulletproof, that only appears to apply to .45 ACP rounds. And how could we forget the great window-smashing debacle of 2019?

Compared to the ubiquitous Toyota Hilux, the machine gun-equipped Cybertruck may just be the worst technical in the history of motorized warfare, even worse than the one an ISIS fighter once improvised out of a shopping cart. But while Kadyrov's video is great social-media fodder, there's some legitimacy behind the absurdity.

The U.S. military, for one, has shown genuine interest in tactical vehicles that run on electricity instead of diesel. The Army's search for a combat-ready EV includes an all-electric version of the Infantry Squad Vehicle. The Air Force is working on an electric ground power unit for the flight line. Hybrid variants of the Joint Light Tactical Vehicle and Heavy Expanded Mobility Tactical Truck are already available.

So give it time. I suspect the U.S. military will field electric tactical vehicles relatively soon -- and when they do, I bet they'll be significantly better than a glitchy and hideous passenger vehicle with a Soviet-era machine gun in the bed.

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