With a worldwide pandemic, a crashing stock market and a population forced to stay indoors, you'd have to have a pretty dark sense of humor to make jokes at a time like this.
Luckily for us, there's no group with a darker sense of humor than the service members and veterans of the United States military.
They did not let us down. In the days that followed the outbreak of the novel coronavirus, or COVID-19, military members and veterans have responded with their own personal humor to lift our spirits momentarily as we settle in for weeks of self-quarantine.
Here are some of the best.
1. "But have you tried drinking more water?"
A change of socks won't kill you either.
2. Remember this every time you use the word "nonner."
Smile through the tears.
3. The coronavirus is totally different now that it's airborne.
Airborne.
4. 0730 Sharp. Even for COVID-19.
You could not live with your own failure. Where did that bring you? Back to us.
5. "But where do you put the bayonet?"
If I remember my 20-minute LOAC CBT, this is totally legal.
6. That day toilet paper became more valuable than NVGs.
Also, actual weapons.
7. The upside of a bad economy is a strong military.
And after the coronavirus recession, this will be recruiters.
8. As if hot racking wasn't bad enough.
"All this and no champagne brunch buffet? This aircraft carrier is the worst vacation ever."
9. This goes triple for desert Port-a-Johns.
The trick is to not touch anything with your hands. Or feet. Or anything. Don't touch anything.
10. Welcome to the party, civilians.
You get used to being treated like untrustworthy children despite your adult appearance in no time.
-- Blake Stilwell can be reached at blake.stilwell@military.com.
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